If you want to change something in your life you have to change your behaviour. Seems quite simple doesn't it? But it often turns out to be far more difficult than you would expect to change those habits which have become automatic.

Why then is it easier said than done to change something when you know what you want to change?

Behaviour goes much more deeply than the physical action you take. It's intimately connected with your thoughts and your beliefs. Your beliefs have probably been ingrained into your subconscious mind for many years already. For example changing a habit such as becoming a non-smoker after countless years of smoking could be connected with a belief that smokers are less boring than non-smokers! So subconsciously you may believe that by stopping smoking you become a boring person.

You have to change your mindset in order to make a successful change. How can you change these underlying beliefs?

You can think carefully about the behaviour you want to stop. Think about when you do it and what you would do instead. Using smoking again as an example: if you smoke in response to stress what could you do the next time you are stressed instead of reaching for a cigarette?

This process can equally apply to whatever habit you want to change. It's useful to look at what you do in response to stress and decide how you will let go of any tension you may experience as a result.

Develop techniques to relax yourself very quickly by connecting to your breathing. Taking a slow breath, breathing in calmness and then a slow breath out, breathing out any tension, is a useful technique to follow.