The holidays are not only a time to appreciate the relationships you have in your life, but what makes the holiday season enjoyable is the very thing that makes your relationships enjoyable. I have just finished all of my preparing for Christmas. This year, I've noticed that I have really been enjoying each minute and each detail in the process of preparing. After all, love is in the details. From decorating the house and the tree to choosing the perfect gift for all of my loved ones to celebrating with all the various wonderful people in my life, I have really been taking the time to smile and be grateful.
I highly recommend this, if only for a few minutes a day! It seems that this is the way to minimize the chaos and stress that often accompanies this season: long lines, traffic, no parking spaces, worrying about what to buy for who and when you will have the time to buy it! Simply writing the previous sentence brought up feelings of anxiety.
Most of us forget that the most rewarding feeling is in the giving. If you can get in touch with that feeling, there is a sense of peacefulness and warmth. This year, try to remember that it isn't about your loved ones thanking you endlessly for the gift you give and it isn't about what gift they give you, the true joy is in giving to them. It seems that many of us suffer needlessly because we place high expectations on the gifts. When you give someone a gift, that's the end of your part in it. They don't owe you anything. Don't set that expectation and you won't be disappointed when they aren't doing kart wheels after they open your gift!
Some of us are financially strained this year and cannot buy the same things we'd like to buy. Well, remember that the most precious gift you can give anyone is your undivided attention. Sit and listen to them without worrying about what you are going to say next in the conversation. Let them know that you are listening very closely and hanging on every word. If anyone has ever given you that gift, you know the feeling of being loved. It is the same feeling. If you want to see a dramatic transformation in all of you relationships, make this a common practice!
With the holidays, comes spending time with Great Aunt Helen, who will sit and try to tell you the same story she's been telling you for the last 20 years. This year, listen like it is the first time. Give her that gift, because you never know how much longer she is going to be around. Someday, you might be just like her. This holiday season, ask yourself if you are tending to your relationships the same way you so generously and thoughtfully picked out the perfect gift for them.
